With the Gulf Oil Spill in it’s second month and BP out of ideas on how to cap the leak in the Gulf, the U. S. government has chosen to activate its most experienced and talented naval unit. This unit will be deployed into the Gulf area with orders to “do whatever is necessary” to bring the nightmare leak to an end. The unit has been authorized by the President of The United States to take control of all Gulf operations and report directly to him.
The unit is led by Captain Jonas Grumby along with his first officer, identified only as Gilligan. Others include a billionaire environmentalist, Thurston Howell, his wife and company CEO, Lovey Howell. Also on the team was science officer and techno-wizard , Professor Roy Hinkley, Ginger Grant, an actress and deep sea diving expert and a country girl named Mary Ann Sommers, described as a master of deep water dynamics. The team is scheduled to assemble tomorrow and commence immediately on a three-hour trip into the spill area.
The group is widely known throughout military and scientific circles for their ingenuity and survival skills and is rumored to be able to build a working radio out of a pineapple, a peddle powered washing machine, as well as a variety of rafts, small sailing vessels, booby traps and luxury huts, with no apparent tools or resources. “We just don’t have anyone else like these guys,” acknowledged Obama. “I’m confident once these guys get on sight we will see a dramatic reduction of the rate at which the oil is leaking.”