REPORT: EARTHQUAKE MAY HAVE STARTED AT SUMO CONVENTION

They Didn't Mean It

A report just released by the Tokyo News Agency claims that the recent Earthquake in Japan may have originated at a Sumo Convention held just outside of Sendai, in Northeastern Japan.    According to Minister of State, Hedeko Fujisoma, preliminary reports back-tracing the 8.9 quake pinpoint its origin at the complex housing the largest ever convention of Sumo Wrestlers in the world.  “We believe we have pinpointed it,” said Fujisoma.  “It’s starting to look like these guys were warming up for their tournament and simultaneously began to do some jumping jacks.”  “With over 1100 of these guys all jumping up and down at the same time, well it was just too much for the fault line to withstand,” he lamented.  “How can anyone think it was preventable,” asked Hiro Nakemora, a wrestler who survived the devastation.    “We were just starting our warm-up and our group leader, Hedikio, said, ” lets all do some jumping jacks to get some cardio.”  “Next thing we know, objects are beginning to shake and some of the buildings started to sway.”   “Knowing what we know now, we should have done some deep knee bends instead,”  he added.

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