Cutthroat Combination

Cutthroat Combination

In a shocking development Convicted murderer Jodi Arias announced that she will wed fellow killer OJ Simpson in a private ceremony in a Maricopia County Jail on June 23rd.  According to Arias the  two became acquainted when Simpson sent her a note indicating he was a big fan and “really appreciated your style.”  Simpson was cleared of murdering his wife, Nicole Brown, despite an overwhelming amount of evidence.  Simpson was unable to remain out of prison however as he was arrested, tried and convicted for his part in a robbery and kidnapping scheme.  Simpson was given special permission to call Arias a few months ago and that phone call lead to a marriage proposal, said Simpson spokesman, Donald Watterson.  “OJ Is feeling great right now, He is on cloud nine,” said Watterson.   “He really believes he may have found his soul mate this time,” he added,    Sources indicate that Simpson will be allowed to travel to the Maricopia Jail to take part in ceremony and then will be taken back to his prison in Las Vegas immediately thereafter. 

The happy couple has established a bridal registry that includes items such as;  a knife set, gloves, a camera, and ski masks.  The will be honeymooning in their respective prison cells. 



Jodi Arias Tells it Like It Is

Jodi Arias Tells it Like It Is

In a very unusual court decision, accused murderess, Jodi Arias has been sentence to life on trial for the murder of her ex-lover, Travis Alexander.  The decision was made nearly four months into her murder trial in order avoid any possibility that she might be set free, like her counterpart, Casey Anthony.  “We just couldn’t take a chance that the jury might be as stupid as those that set O.J. Simpson and Casey Anthony free,” said Judge Sherry Stephans.  “It just seemed like the best option to make sure she never sees the light of day again.” 

“After all these months and the great TV press and ratings we are getting, we just wanted to keep it going,” she added. 

Prosecutor, Juan Martinez indicated his support for the plan.  “With all the idiot juries we’ve seen lately, this is the safest bet,” he stated.  “It’s not an ideal conclusion for the state but, it sure beats the risk of letting her back on the street.”  “It works for me because I now have a steady case to work on and it will bring some stability to all of us including Mr. Nurmi and his staff,” he added. 

Life on trial is a newly developed concept and the Arias case will be the first to impose such a sentence.  It is expected to be a landmark decision and a point of interest for attorneys all over the country.  As a result of this decision, HLN will be assigning Nancy Grace and Jane Valez Mitchell to Phoenix permanently.   “Now that we know this trial will continue indefinitely, somebody will have to break the news to the jury, some of whom had been planning to go home eventually. 

In order to maintain the audiences interest in the case, the court is considering allowing viewers to send in questions for Ms. Arias to answer.